Blizzard 2011

Wow! We are waiting on one of the worst winter storms in 30 years tonight! And, let me tell you, if you were out and about today, you KNOW something big is coming!

We did prepare for the storm. We bought way too many groceries. We have a big stockpile of toilet paper & milk. I'm not sure why - but isn't that what you buy in a snowstorm??? We've spent WAY too much of our lives listening to & watching weather forcasts on the TV, radio & internet. Again, I'm not sure why - but isn't that what you do before a snowstorm? We've charged all of our rechargeable stuff, bought spare batteries & bottled up plenty of water. We are ready. Red Dirt Ready! :) (If you don't live in OK, I apologize - it's a disaster preparedness campaign that I think is ludicrous.)

Something that I don't understand is the need for huge quantities of beer. Every time I've been to the store since Saturday, I see people loading up their carts with beer - beer & chips. Am I missing something? I didn't stock up on beer or chips. I got a bunch of green bananas - but I missed out on the beer. Somebody help me understand! Should I run out really quick and get some? Does it stop my pipes from freezing, or melt snow off the front steps? There must be something to it......

Well, I'm currently trying to calm my kids down and put them in bed. They are so hyped up I'm having to peel them off the ceilings to get them to bed. Maybe people are using the beer to.......nah....probably not.

Kiddo Conversations

I picked up Hamilton from school today with the little two in tow. When Hamilton entered the van, I started the "mom after school questions" that most moms ask: How was your day? What did you eat for lunch? Tell me something about your day. ANYTHING to get something out of Hamilton other than, "It was fine." Or (my favorite reply to: What did you learn today?) "Nothing." I finally hushed and became content to listen to the radio - and then I hear this conversation coming from the back of the van:

Hamilton: Hey - I'm going to be an author or an illustrator when I grow up.

Harrison: Cool! Can I come?

Hamilton: Sure - do you know what they do?

Harrison: No. But I wanna come. What do they do?

Hamilton: Well, one writes the words to books, and the other draws and colors the pictures to the books. I don't know which one I want to be.

Harrison: I'd like to write the book's words with you. I'm going to be pretty busy though, I'm going to be a firefighter. Do they have days off? Maybe I can work on writing book words when I have a day off. But I'm going to be a daddy too - do they get days off?

Hamilton: I'm going to be a daddy too. Yeah, they get days off and I'll draw and color the pictures.

Harrison: Since I'm helping you with your book, you can help me hold my hose when I hafta fight fires, OK?

Hamilton: OK. Sounds good.


Let me tell you - MY KIDS HAVE GOT IT TOGETHER - at 7 and 5! How stinkin' cute is that? This conversation was so cute, I had a hard time breathing. All the while Henderson is chiming in, "Me too! Me too!" I'm going to be one proud mama of 3 great men in about 20 years! I know their plans may not always pan out, but I pray that they always involve each other! I know I couldn't make it without my sisters! Happy Tuesday, everyone!

Gonna Hafta Face It

I'm needing to vent, so you've been warned! (I'm also having a bit of a pity-party too!)

I was awake until almost 2 this morning thinking and worrying about Harrison's Crohn's. A friend of mine told me about a Chiropractor that specializes in the disease in children, and the chiropractor is right here in Owasso. She mentioned that the chiro had never turned away anyone from inability to pay. (We are doing all we can to keep up with medical bills at this point and don't have a lot of money to throw at "alternative" healing methods.)

A few months ago I took Harrison to a healer that looks in a person's iris and can tell what is wrong with their bodies. She told me that Harrison's colon was "very sick." This was before I told her about the diagnosis of Crohn's or any history at all. She recommended against the medical treatment that we are currently giving Harrison. He is on Imuran and his immune system is being suppressed right now. I was so confused when I left her office - did I rely on the herbal treatments she was suggesting, or did I stay with the medical doctor's advice?

So, if I go to this chiropractor, I'll be faced with the same decision - and I don't know the right thing to do! I pray and pray, but I'm not getting any "writing on the wall" about what the right thing to do is.

I HATE, HATE the fact that I've spent all my motherhood years feeding my children to make them grow & have healthy immune systems, and now every morning I'm giving him a tiny yellow pill that is killing his immune system. I certainly don't feel right about that! I lose sleep over that almost every night. I'm told by the Dr.'s that we are very fortunate that he has responded so well to this drug - that he could have to be on more powerful drugs - but I find myself unable to be thankful for that.

I also hate that he is 5 and dealing with all this. A little of me dies everytime we have to have another test done, another vial of blood taken. Again, I'm told how blessed I am to have a child that doesn't cry at needles, but, I am having a hard time being thankful for that. I'm supposed to have the answers, aren't I? I'm supposed to know how to best protect my child, and I have no idea. I'm very well-read on Crohn's now. I still have no clear path to take.

All I can rely on is that God is hearing my prayers and that He knows what's best for Harrison and He will protect him. I know God hears my prayers. But right now, I feel so alone. Some day, I'm going to have to face the fact that I have a sick kiddo and just "walk it off." Maybe I can just accept it someday. I'm not there yet. I'm still in some kind of weird mourning. In time I guess.....in time.

Going Down, Anyone??

So, almost 5 years ago I started on a weight loss journey, and one that proved to be successful for me. I started the Sonoma Diet. It cuts sugar out & limits your bread/cereal/pasta. It's not really low carb, but it's certainly not high carb either. I lost 115 pounds on this diet. I was going to go all the way! After being so big after my first two pregnancies and having pre-eclampsia and coming amazingly close to having seizures with both of them, I was told that I would not survive another pregnancy if I didn't lose some weight. So, wanting a third child, I lost a significant amount of weight.

And then came my sweet, funny baby #3! Tagging along with that was 50 extra pounds. So - he's almost 3 years old, and I'm hanging on to 40 of said 50 pounds. Way to go Janelle!

After many attempts to lose the weight by myself, I asked Matt to go on a diet with me. Matt has high blood pressure and a family history of heart disease & high cholesterol. He agreed and at the beginning of the month we started Sonoma again.

Matt has lost 10.5 pounds and I've lost 11.5 pounds. We are really on a roll. Matt is really into this and he should be at his goal weight this summer. While I have 40 to lose to be at my pre-pregnancy weight with Henderson, I would like to lose another 40 on top of that. Losing 80 pounds would still label me "overweight", but I'd be happy, and I think it'd be a good weight for me.

We took the boys out for pizza tonight. They had pepperoni and we had veggie. I ate three slices (way too much) and Matt had 2 slices. Stinker. Show off. Now I feel guilty and gross, but he said I should just move on and not be all-or-nothing. That's my diet pitfall. If I stumble at all, I figure I've already done bad...why not blow the rest of the day & have a pint of ice cream too???

I'm so thankful for Matt in so many ways - and we've done so many things together & we work well as a team - but I'm so glad he is doing this with me. He balances me. He talks me out of my extreme all-or-nothing attitude. I steer him clear of too much bread!

I'm excited about this challenge that we are doing together. We are dreaming of buying a new wardrobe of clothes for our newer, healthier bodies. How exciting. And this time, it's not so I can get pregnant again, it's so I can live the next 60 years of my life healthy! Who knows, maybe this time next year, I'll have reached my goal, and I'll shop in the normal stores for my clothes! That excites me.

I Want Snow!

I am wanting a big snow before this winter is over! I mean a BIG snow! Like the kind of snow that calls school out for a few days. The kind of snow where you panic mid-way through the snow storm thinking you forgot toilet paper during your "milk and bread" run to the store last night. The kind of snow that empties out the grocery store with people buying food (on their milk & bread run) like they are never going to eat again. Maybe even lose power for 2 hours - not longer though, because I like the adventure of it, but I'm a city girl & I like my fridge & hot showers.

My kids are hoping for a big snow too. In fact, they were so disgusted that we didn't have snow on the ground this weekend that they planted a garden. With canatlope. Lots of it. Lets hope our BIG snow will kill some of it out!

I know the storm headed this way later this week isn't supposed to be big, but, secretly, I'm hoping!

Live, Love, Life

This week has been hard on me emotionally.

I lost a second cousin unexpectedly this weekend. He was 75, and the picture of health, but died unexpectedly after a small surgery. He had a blood clot & died suddenly.

It's not that we were particularly close, but death jolts me. I know that I'm scared of it - I know many of my friends say they are not, but I don't understand that. I think more than fear, it's the reality of knowing that our lives that we are blessed to live every day can be over in a blink of an eye. Death can come in a long, labor intensive struggle, or it can come quickly and without warning.

I'm a planner. I like a routine. My family depends on my routines! Without them our house does not function. That being said, I'm not so sure I want to plan for that particular event in my life. I'm not sure I want to know about it in advance.

I'm a Christian, and I know that heaven exists and I feel confident that I will see heaven when I die. (Just thought I'd put a little disclaimer there.) I've had Christian friends not understand my fear of death - I mean - if you know you are going to heaven, whats to fear?? Plenty. Getting dead is one! And the great unknown - the mystery of it - it scares me.

I've thought about it a lot over the past few days. The death of a person close to me always makes me want to right my wrongs. Death always makes me want to live life to the fullest. Not necessarily sky diving or deep sea diving - but loving. Loving my family, friends and this wondrous earth that our God created for us.

Give some extra love this week. Give a hug, a smile, an encouraging word or some time to someone who needs it. Be a friend. Do it again the next week, and the week after that, and the week after that.....